Lies
by Vestque the Artist
Summary: Sequel to 'Tourniquet.' But through my tears breaks a blinding light,birthing a dawn to this endless night Arms outstretched, awaiting me,an open embrace upon a bleeding tree. Raph Centric, Evanescence song fic One shot. Complete.


OK, hello. Got the idea for this Sequel right after writing, 'Tourniquet,' but I just had to find the right song for it.

Now that I have…

Disclaimer: Don't own Ninja turtles, Or Evanescence…but Karen is all mine!

Lies

Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear  
Sealed with lies through so many tears

Raphael had always been important to me, a friend when I had no one else, always standing by my side even when no one else would. And for that, I love him.

Even more that he'd ever know.

But now, I am afraid. Afraid for what I was, afraid for who I was.

Afraid that if something happened, I might go back to who I was…to who I hate.

An empty shell of person, that was it, of whom Raphael had to fill. He saved that shell from the lies and the deception of my ex-boyfriend only to fill me with his own heart, his own love.

But now, I could not be too sure that he would live long enough to complete the job.

Which would be my death as well.

But that could only be expected when you loved someone.

Lost from within, pursuing the end  
I fight for the chance to be lied to again

He saved me from myself, and for that I will be forever his…

He was and always has been my protector, protecting me from the evils of this world. A hero of sorts.

My hero.

I know that now nothing can harm me, no more lies, no more deceit. I almost want to test him at that fact though. If someone should try to hurt me again, how exactly would he handle it?

Sometimes I want to look for the chance to challenge him, just to see how far my hero would go to defend me.

But then I remember times like before…

I could never wish for something like that to happen again, mainly because I am still healing from it.

Still healing from my wounds, mentally and physically.

But Raph is different, different than my Ex. He is my protector, and for that, he is my savior as well.

You will never be strong enough  
You will never be good enough  
You were never conceived in love  
You will not rise above

Never again do I have to listen to those deceitful lies. Not with Raphael.

Never with Raphael.

But it seems that simple reassurance is now in jeopardy.

Raphael is hurt, maybe even enough to never see the light of day again…And with that, my light would be in jeopardy as well.

They'll never see   
I'll never be  
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger  
Burning deep inside of me

It was three hours ago that I received the first phone call.

And as fate would have it, the bringer of bad news my new boyfriend's rival and brother, Leonardo.

-Flashback-  
Hello?  
Hey, Karen, it's Leo.  
Oh, hey Leo. What's up?  
Well…-silence-  
Leo? What's wrong?  
Well, it's about Raphael…  
What? Raphael? No…  
I think you should come on down. I'll send Mikey to come get you.  
Alright, Leonardo. See you soon then, I guess.  
**-dial tone-  
**-End Flashback-

I soon found myself outside of the home that housed my only family, second to that of my parents.

Nevertheless, this is the place of my love, the only place where I can get my hunger and wants satisfied.

My hunger to love.

My hunger to be loved, it all ends here…

"Ah, Karen. I think you should wait here, ok?"

Michelangelo, the silly one, the one that can make anyone laugh, was instructing me to stay and in response, I nodded obediently, watching him solemnly as he disappeared inside.

Sometimes I don't think the other's realize exactly how deep our feelings are for each other. Sometimes I just don't think they know….I don't think they realize just how much Raphael means to me and likewise, how much I mean to him. I think they believe that I'm just a simple minded girl, swooning over her "hero" like a love sick puppy.

But it's more than that, a lot more.

Raphael had even said so, right before our first kiss, and before our first night of passion.

But through my tears breaks a blinding light  
Birthing a dawn to this endless night  
Arms outstretched, awaiting me

"Ok, Karen. I think you can come in now." Michelangelo's tenor voice echoed the cold tunnels I now resided in, only to inform me that I was now welcome in their home. I immediately made good of the invite, stepping into the warm lair as soon as my feet awoke from their cold slumber.

Only to gasp at what awaited me there.

An open embrace upon a bleeding tree

"We found him an hour ago…in an alley outside of the deli."

Leo's solemn voice now filled my consciousness, knocking me from my shocked state and into a harsh reality.

Raphael lay unconscious on the couch, his skin slick with sweat and blood, his body bruised with the beating of a lifetime. His breathing was rough, hallowed…labored.

And so were my sobs as I wept…

Rest in me and I'll comfort you  
I have lived and I died for you

"Will he…be ok?" My voice was foreign to me, choked with tears as they ran down my cheeks. From somewhere, a large two fingered hand patted my back reassuringly, but I didn't not turn to see who's. Instead, I just listened to Donatello's calm, collected, voice as he spoke.

"Actually, we were hoping that _you_ could tell _us_."

Abide in me and I vow to you  
I will never forsake you

Michelangelo appeared before me now, kneeling to look his fallen brother in the face, his own face solemn with a seriousness I've never seen on him before. Meanwhile, from somewhere unseen behind me, Donatello continued.

"He has a concussion, which isn't too bad, but only if he is awake. Otherwise, it can be fatal…" His voice trailed off, but I still did not understand.

"Is their any way we can help him?"

My own voice cracked as I immediately fell to my knees before my one and only love. Move with emotion that was beyond my control, I took one of his large green hands in my own. His blood was hot beneath his skin, I noted with interest, but I barely got a chance to ponder over it for soon Donatello's next few words racked my brain, sending what ever thoughts I had into orbit.

"We've already tried…and failed. But you? You might have a chance."

They'll never see   
I'll never be  
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger  
Burning deep inside of me

"Me?"

"Yeah." Michelangelo spoke now as he looked up from his brother, his best friend, and into my face. I was just barely able to make out the tracks of hot wet tears on his cheeks as he continued, his voice soft. "We know how much you mean to him, so if anyone could get through to him, it would be you."

They'll never see   
I'll never be

"What?"

I was at a lack of words. They knew, they knew all along.

"Well it's hard to not see how much he loves you Karen, he talks about you all the time." Mike's face turn back to his brother's again, a single tear joining the tracks that already inhabited his cheek. Meanwhile, my eyes must have mirrored my incredulity for Leo soon stepped out of the shadows that was the corner of the room, his own voice soft as he added his two cent.

"It's true Karen, you're always on his mind, therefore you're the only one that can help him now."

I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger  
Burning deep inside of me

I thought over their words, absently counting down each turtle visible and non visible only to decipher that Donatello was the one still patting my back. I turned now too look the purple wearing turtle in the eye only to find the same solemn conviction on his face as well.

He, too, believed that I could help his dying brother.

The only question now was did I?

Rest in me and I'll comfort you  
I have lived and I died for you

With the turtles to believe in me when I didn't, I scooted up to my lover's face and as a result, Michelangelo moved to allow me the space.

However, my breath hitched when I did; he looked even worse when close up.

The black and blue almost completely blocked out the green, making his entire face discolored and bruised.

He was in bad condition.

I choked back the sob that was willing itself out before focusing on the task at hand.

He had been strong for me, I all but owed it to him now.

I would be his rock, his guide, his protector, when no one else could.

Abide in me and I vow to you  
I will never forsake you

"What exactly do you want me to do?"  
My voice was serenely quiet against the back drop of ragged breathing that was my lover's and as a response, the turtles breathed as well.

"Talk to him." Was Donatello's response, "Let him know that you are here."

I turned then, only to see the rest of them nod as well as the one that instructed me.

I had read somewhere that at a time like this, the voice of a loved one could bring the unconscious back to the living world, but I never read if that was true or not.

Well I guess now I'll be finding that out now, won't I?

"Raph." I turned then, grasping his large hand in my two, kissing his knuckles absently before turning my attention back to his face. "Raphael, it's me, Karen."

They'll never see   
I'll never be

Suddenly, I became overwhelmed, my voice racking as a sudden sob escaped my throat. From behind me I could hear a scurrying as all three of his brothers reached for me, but I held up a hand, stopping them all in their tracks.

I would be strong, for him, just as he was for me. I would be a savior, just as he was for me.

"Raphael, I don't know what you see or where you are right now, but I do know that you cannot leave us. Michelangelo, Donatello, and even Leo, they love you too much, Raph. They couldn't live without you.

I couldn't live without you."

"You cannot die, Raph. You just can't. If you do, we all would be lost. We need you, that's why you must to come back to us. And that's why you must come back to me. I love you, Raphael, we all do. Now please…come back…"

I broke then, finally allowing my tears to fall free. Meanwhile, the rest of the beings in the room watched on in anticipation.

But he did not stir.

After a moment I felt their sprits fall, and unable to hold back anymore, I sobbed unmercifully. The final realization that he might not be waking up hit me like a ton of bricks.

'What would I do with out him? Nothing, is what. I would die.'

I cupped my cheek in his hand, desperate beyond anything to have him feel it, to feel it on my cheek for the last time, but before I could let go…his hand twitched as it grasped my face _all on it's own_.

"…Karen?"

I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger

Burning deep inside of me

His voice was quiet, so quiet I almost didn't hear it, but I did, and with that came tears of joy. From behind me his brothers were ecstatic, each one of them speaking my praises and grinning. However, I did not hear them.

I only could hear one voice, one quiet raspy voice, which turned out to be the only voice that truly mattered.

"I could never leave you, Karen. _Never_. I love you too much to leave you behind…"

-

The Lyrics for the song, (w/o interruption)

Evanescence:

Lies

_Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear  
Sealed with lies through so many tears  
__Lost from within, pursuing the end  
I fight for the chance to be lied to again_

_You will never be strong enough  
You will never be good enough  
You were never conceived in love  
You will not rise above_

_They'll never see   
I'll never be  
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger  
Burning deep inside of me_

_But through my tears breaks a blinding light  
Birthing a dawn to this endless night  
Arms outstretched, awaiting me  
An open embrace upon a bleeding tree_

_Rest in me and I'll comfort you  
I have lived and I died for you  
__Abide in me and I vow to you  
I will never forsake you_

_They'll never see   
I'll never be  
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger  
Burning deep inside of me_

_They'll never see   
I'll never be  
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger  
Burning deep inside of me_

_Rest in me and I'll comfort you  
I have lived and I died for you  
Abide in me and I vow to you  
I will never forsake you_

_They'll never see   
I'll never be  
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger  
Burning deep inside of me_

-

Hm, my first 'First person' fic. Different to write, but I think it came out ok. Review and tell me if you think so too, and what I can do to get better at it. Or just tell me what you thought of the story, and I'll be happy, Lol! 


End file.
